It’s Not the Sheriff of Nottingham’s Fault

It’s Not All the Sheriff of Nottingham’s Fault

I support the peasants of Nottingham. I think they should be given more to eat; as long as the Sheriff can afford it.

I know some peasants,and most of them are good and hardworking. Those are the ones we should give more food to. But some of those peasants are greedy and dead lazy, and they think they’re so smart, always demanding something for nothing.

If we could figure out a way to give more food to the good peasants, I’d be all for it. Until then, I don’t want to give any of them one more crust of bread.

Because where’s the bread going to come from? 

From the Sherriff? From Prince John ?Poor Prince John can’t afford it; his budget is tight ,what with feting the Dukes and Earls regularly.

No, as usual, it’ll come from you and me,; and we’re even poorer than those whining peasants – they should have to be as poor as I am.

These constant fights between the Sheriff of Nottingham and the peasants can’t go on. Every harvest time it’s the same old thing. 

I’m sick of it. Both sides need to wake up and smell the mead.

 Sure the Sheriff of Nottingham has been a bit mean to the peasants lo these last twelve years, what with the whippings, the beatings and the burning down of houses, and God knows Prince John has unfairly taxed them to starvation, broken a few small promises and yes, he did rip up the Magna Carta…

But you know, those peasants aren’t blameless… what with their attitude of entitlement year after year; always poaching the kings animals for food and demanding they need more and more food and claiming that other peasants get more food than they do.

And sure, maybe other dukedoms do give their peasants more food, but if they think they’re hard done by, they should come and see the real suffering that goes on in private around Sherwood Forest.

The peasants always say it’s about fairness; but they’re really just out for themselves. They always say they want food for their children, it’s always all for the children, so that the children will be healthy, but it’s really about themselves, always wanting more food every year; I’m sick of it.

And those “Merry Men” who “fight” for the peasants are horrible and they always lie and I think most peasants like them less than I do.They’re always against everything Prince John does no matter what it is.

They’ve never accepted their tax increases and annual ration cuts. And that Robin Hood; he thinks he’s so smart all the time, robbing rich guys and giving to poor guys.

Who’s going to hire us to work for nothing if Robin Hood keeps stealing all their  money? 

My brother in law is a peasant and he does nothing all summer, and he complains about never having enough food. He should come to my house where we have to eat berries and stone soup.  

I think the peasants would get a lot further if they accepted the Sheriff’s offer of no food at all for two years and a ten percent cut in food if they don’t accept the offer. that’s what the rest of us got.

 Both sides need to grow up.  We should lock Robin Hood and the Sheriff of Nottingham in a room and not let them out until they agree on how much food Prince John can spare; as long as it’s less each year for six years, which is what Prince John has said he can spare. 

Those peasants need to be a bit more willing to negotiate with the Sheriff and Prince John – he’s proven reliable in the past.

And maybe if the peasants would stop always asking for more and more food for themselves and concentrate instead on portion size and composition, it would make the public respect them more.

About jimnelson806

Educational consultant from Port Moody. "The Stuff Isn't What's Important" " School Wide Discipline Programmes Don't Work" " Vice Principals are crucial towards setting direction"
This entry was posted in New Rules in B.C. Education Dispute, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to It’s Not the Sheriff of Nottingham’s Fault

  1. Reblogged this on margnelson2011 and commented:
    “…wake up and smell the mead”. Very funny. Jonathan Swift would approve!


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